Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Adios 2008
The year is finally about to end! I have never looked forward to the next year as I have this time. It was a very different year-2008. A year of adjustments and transitions. Of new roles and new situations.
2008 Gave us Mowgli; Made us parents; Taught us how to love unconditionally; Made us look at our parents anew while they slipped into the role of grand parents with ease.
It also took away my job and our plans along with it; made me rethink my priorities, made me go crazy with despair at times sitting at home endlessly cleaning up after mowgli. My whole life revolved around him this year. Days when he ate well slept well, I was relaxed. But those days were quite few. Most of the time I was tired, back aching, feet aching and wishing that I could just go home and relax with somebody else to look after mowgli. Irritated most of the time at how our home looked, fed up with people who took us for granted and popped in and out at their own will, irked at most of the things I used to like before. It was a strange year.
We welcomed a new member, my brother-in-law, into our crazy family this year and will see off my sister to France at the start. She will be back only by next December. A long year lies ahead without her. We fight day and night, but I love her a lot. However much she grows up, she will always be my little sister. My responsibility. I so want to protect her and keep her safe and happy always. She has always been the quiet and ambitious one. May the next year grant her success in her career. But let it also teach her that family is more important than everything else.
It seemed to be a year that gave importance to relationships. Almost all our friends got engaged/married this year. Those who were married had babies/ became pregnant. Slowly all of us have left behind the carefree days of college and are moving towards responsibilities. It is a difficult time- this transition phase. Hopefully we will all adjust and learn to strike that balance between what we were and what we are now.
This year was also one of fear. Fear when the BH was away on his tours. Scared for Mowgli thinking about the world that we have brought him into. Worried about how he will cope with a maid/crèche. Hearing shocking stories from other parents and praying hard that they will remain just that. Stories and things that happen to others.
What do I wish for in 2009?
Oh to go back to those days when being happy came naturally and it was not something you had to work at!
Blissful days and nights with my husband.
Moments to cherish with my son.
A job that will allow me to work on my terms.
Friends, love and laughter to fill our home once more and overwhelm us all
Cupid to attack us once again to rekindle the embers.
Full of these little joys and sunshine and my cup overfloweth.
2008 Gave us Mowgli; Made us parents; Taught us how to love unconditionally; Made us look at our parents anew while they slipped into the role of grand parents with ease.
It also took away my job and our plans along with it; made me rethink my priorities, made me go crazy with despair at times sitting at home endlessly cleaning up after mowgli. My whole life revolved around him this year. Days when he ate well slept well, I was relaxed. But those days were quite few. Most of the time I was tired, back aching, feet aching and wishing that I could just go home and relax with somebody else to look after mowgli. Irritated most of the time at how our home looked, fed up with people who took us for granted and popped in and out at their own will, irked at most of the things I used to like before. It was a strange year.
We welcomed a new member, my brother-in-law, into our crazy family this year and will see off my sister to France at the start. She will be back only by next December. A long year lies ahead without her. We fight day and night, but I love her a lot. However much she grows up, she will always be my little sister. My responsibility. I so want to protect her and keep her safe and happy always. She has always been the quiet and ambitious one. May the next year grant her success in her career. But let it also teach her that family is more important than everything else.
It seemed to be a year that gave importance to relationships. Almost all our friends got engaged/married this year. Those who were married had babies/ became pregnant. Slowly all of us have left behind the carefree days of college and are moving towards responsibilities. It is a difficult time- this transition phase. Hopefully we will all adjust and learn to strike that balance between what we were and what we are now.
This year was also one of fear. Fear when the BH was away on his tours. Scared for Mowgli thinking about the world that we have brought him into. Worried about how he will cope with a maid/crèche. Hearing shocking stories from other parents and praying hard that they will remain just that. Stories and things that happen to others.
What do I wish for in 2009?
Oh to go back to those days when being happy came naturally and it was not something you had to work at!
Blissful days and nights with my husband.
Moments to cherish with my son.
A job that will allow me to work on my terms.
Friends, love and laughter to fill our home once more and overwhelm us all
Cupid to attack us once again to rekindle the embers.
Full of these little joys and sunshine and my cup overfloweth.
Goodbye 2008.
Cheers 2009.
God Bless
Monday, December 15, 2008
And we are off!
To Kerala tomorrow.
Free from cooking and cleaning.
Total relaxation.
Many willing hands to play with Mowgli, carry him around, listen to all his requests and treat him like a king. As for poor me, I'll read and eat and sleep and laze around and Turn a deaf ear to the advices!!! Mowgli is just recovering from a severe bout of diarrhoea and has become half his size! So am sure to be hearing a lot of views on why he is so thin, why he has not yet started walking, why does he have only four teeth and not more. Oh, the list is endless. But for once I have decided not to let anything bother me. Taking a leaf out of my sister’s book; Smile politely at everyone, listen and nod sagely at each piece of advice that you get and then proceed to do what you want!
One of our close friends is getting married tomorrow in Kannur. Its 12 hours from here. The BH can’t make it as it’s the quarter end and he’s almost dead with the pressure. So it’s just Mowgli and me with our friends. I am hoping that mowgli will behave. Fully prepared with new toys, food and the like. The BH got me a nice Assam silk from one of his tours. I will be wearing that. Its a cream sari with blue and black hand embroidery done. Mowgli is wearing a traditional kurta-pajama that he got on his birthday. We both hope to rock!!!!
From there another 6 hours train journey to the BH’s home town. We’ll be there for a week and then on to my place to celebrate X’mas. I think the biggest advantage of marrying somebody from a different religion is that you get to celebrate all your festivals with your parents J it’s a win-win situation for the husband and the wife and the grand parents. (Now why don’t they think of all these advantages instead of over reacting!!!!)
Mowgli is much better now as compared to the last two weeks. He’s eating better and looking much much better. It was horrible to see him lose so much weight within 2-3 days and the poor guy crying with the tummy pains and feeling so tired after each bout of loose motion. The doctors have said that it will take time to recover. Once he is better we have to again visit the doctor as they want to discuss Mowgli’s growth progress!!! He is totally underweight and under height L 8.5 kgs for a one year old and 70 cm! Pathetic,na?
We have made an album of Mowgli's life, from the time he was born till he shaved his head, as a X'mas present for his grand parents. All four grandparents are going to be completely fida over it!
So Happy X’mas and I’ll be back with a huge surprise for all of you!
Free from cooking and cleaning.
Total relaxation.
Many willing hands to play with Mowgli, carry him around, listen to all his requests and treat him like a king. As for poor me, I'll read and eat and sleep and laze around and Turn a deaf ear to the advices!!! Mowgli is just recovering from a severe bout of diarrhoea and has become half his size! So am sure to be hearing a lot of views on why he is so thin, why he has not yet started walking, why does he have only four teeth and not more. Oh, the list is endless. But for once I have decided not to let anything bother me. Taking a leaf out of my sister’s book; Smile politely at everyone, listen and nod sagely at each piece of advice that you get and then proceed to do what you want!
One of our close friends is getting married tomorrow in Kannur. Its 12 hours from here. The BH can’t make it as it’s the quarter end and he’s almost dead with the pressure. So it’s just Mowgli and me with our friends. I am hoping that mowgli will behave. Fully prepared with new toys, food and the like. The BH got me a nice Assam silk from one of his tours. I will be wearing that. Its a cream sari with blue and black hand embroidery done. Mowgli is wearing a traditional kurta-pajama that he got on his birthday. We both hope to rock!!!!
From there another 6 hours train journey to the BH’s home town. We’ll be there for a week and then on to my place to celebrate X’mas. I think the biggest advantage of marrying somebody from a different religion is that you get to celebrate all your festivals with your parents J it’s a win-win situation for the husband and the wife and the grand parents. (Now why don’t they think of all these advantages instead of over reacting!!!!)
Mowgli is much better now as compared to the last two weeks. He’s eating better and looking much much better. It was horrible to see him lose so much weight within 2-3 days and the poor guy crying with the tummy pains and feeling so tired after each bout of loose motion. The doctors have said that it will take time to recover. Once he is better we have to again visit the doctor as they want to discuss Mowgli’s growth progress!!! He is totally underweight and under height L 8.5 kgs for a one year old and 70 cm! Pathetic,na?
We have made an album of Mowgli's life, from the time he was born till he shaved his head, as a X'mas present for his grand parents. All four grandparents are going to be completely fida over it!
So Happy X’mas and I’ll be back with a huge surprise for all of you!
Friday, December 12, 2008
"A happy home...
... is one in which each spouse grants the possibility that the
other may be right, though neither believes it."
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
You and me and ours...
The new dining table arrived. I spent an hour looking at it from all angles, imagining life with this new addition to the family. Meal times that linger on… homework being done… gossiping with friends over coffee… children talking about their day ( as of now just Mowgli, but hopefully many more :-) )… the BH thinks I am crazy to do this and to weave so many dreams into the future but well that is how I am! 
A year into our marriage we bought a house. The woodwork and everything sucked into our savings leaving us with absolutely nothing in the bank to do the furnishings. As usual these got delegated to a later day when we have the money. (This seems to be a steady refrain with us; I think “when we have the money then we will do this and that and that.”) Everybody from home planned to come for the house-warming thus making a cot essential. My grand parents were coming; obviously you couldn’t expect them to sleep on the floor. We fought over cots, visited different shops and finally fell in love with the furniture at Maya Organic. Simple yet elegant rubber wood furniture stained to match the décor of your home. We saw two cots that we loved, had the budget only for one. Bought that and went back to that shop 6 months later to buy the other one (by then they had hiked the price by 4k!!!).
All the things in our house are precious to us and if you ask me, I can tell you the exact time we bought it, how many months we saved for it, how we planned for it. I know people who buy everything as soon as they get married. But somehow it just doesn’t feel right. After all what is marriage without experiencing the joy ( or misery) of sleeping on the floor, eating from one plate, saving for that particular chair that you saw and cribbing over being broke?
We started our married life with just a single cot mattress and a TV. An odd combination, you say. The TV was a gift. The mattress came from my bachelor days. We were both broke. The BH had just joined a new office and all our savings had been spent on our wedding. The first thing that we bought was a fridge, as I “assumed” that now that I had got married I would immediately metamorphose into a bharatiya nari and start cooking breakfast, lunch, dinner and the umpteen snacks in between. If I was going to cook so much, obviously there were going to be leftovers and therefore we needed a fridge most importantly. No small fridges for me, than you very much. It has to be a huge fridge with space enough to store food for a small army. Talk about foresight. Hahaha, I had grossly underestimated my mom’s cooking skills. The fridge for the most part of the 2 years has been lonely with just a packet of milk, bread and butter as company. Till Mowgli came along we have been weekend cookers( excuse the pun!) mainly living off take-aways, cornflakes ( that’s the BH-poor guy, he has been forced to have cornflakes, good ol’ bread and the like for breakfast while I go gorge on yummy idlis, dosas, parathas at office). Now that I’m staying at home our fridge is slowly being put to optimum use. The snacks have yet to come, but at least lunch and dinner are getting done now!
With the BH grumbling every morning that I push him out to the floor every night, the next item to come along was a double cot mattress (P.S. we have a king size bed now and still the BH grumbles every night that we push him to a corner and he hardly has any place to sleep!!! Doesn’t it look like he has a “space” problem? :-)) . The single mattress was relegated to the drawing room and made into an impromptu seating arrangement with cushions and bolsters. Meals were had on the floor. We watched TV lying on the floor. Those were idyllic days; the BH watched all the series of Godfather and Die Hard in marathon sessions while I slept/read the whole day. Evenings were spent with friends roaming around or the guys would make chicken/beef/pork at home. We never felt the need for more furniture.
A friend who was going for a long term onsite lend us his antique semi automatic washing machine. Till then the BH and I used to wash the clothes together. Even after getting the washing machine he would help me in putting out the clothes for drying, pouring water into the machine, cleaning up the bathroom after the washing had finished. Now we have a fully automatic one and the BH “talks” about helping me with the washing!!!!
Repeated nagging from my mom forced us to finally think of buying some more furniture. We wanted an ethnic look but didn’t have the budget for it. As a temporary arrangement, we settled for good old cane furniture for the drawing room and a four seater dining table. More than enough for us.
We started our married life with just a single cot mattress and a TV. An odd combination, you say. The TV was a gift. The mattress came from my bachelor days. We were both broke. The BH had just joined a new office and all our savings had been spent on our wedding. The first thing that we bought was a fridge, as I “assumed” that now that I had got married I would immediately metamorphose into a bharatiya nari and start cooking breakfast, lunch, dinner and the umpteen snacks in between. If I was going to cook so much, obviously there were going to be leftovers and therefore we needed a fridge most importantly. No small fridges for me, than you very much. It has to be a huge fridge with space enough to store food for a small army. Talk about foresight. Hahaha, I had grossly underestimated my mom’s cooking skills. The fridge for the most part of the 2 years has been lonely with just a packet of milk, bread and butter as company. Till Mowgli came along we have been weekend cookers( excuse the pun!) mainly living off take-aways, cornflakes ( that’s the BH-poor guy, he has been forced to have cornflakes, good ol’ bread and the like for breakfast while I go gorge on yummy idlis, dosas, parathas at office). Now that I’m staying at home our fridge is slowly being put to optimum use. The snacks have yet to come, but at least lunch and dinner are getting done now!
With the BH grumbling every morning that I push him out to the floor every night, the next item to come along was a double cot mattress (P.S. we have a king size bed now and still the BH grumbles every night that we push him to a corner and he hardly has any place to sleep!!! Doesn’t it look like he has a “space” problem? :-)) . The single mattress was relegated to the drawing room and made into an impromptu seating arrangement with cushions and bolsters. Meals were had on the floor. We watched TV lying on the floor. Those were idyllic days; the BH watched all the series of Godfather and Die Hard in marathon sessions while I slept/read the whole day. Evenings were spent with friends roaming around or the guys would make chicken/beef/pork at home. We never felt the need for more furniture.
A friend who was going for a long term onsite lend us his antique semi automatic washing machine. Till then the BH and I used to wash the clothes together. Even after getting the washing machine he would help me in putting out the clothes for drying, pouring water into the machine, cleaning up the bathroom after the washing had finished. Now we have a fully automatic one and the BH “talks” about helping me with the washing!!!!
Repeated nagging from my mom forced us to finally think of buying some more furniture. We wanted an ethnic look but didn’t have the budget for it. As a temporary arrangement, we settled for good old cane furniture for the drawing room and a four seater dining table. More than enough for us.
[We cruised along with these for more than a year. ]
A year into our marriage we bought a house. The woodwork and everything sucked into our savings leaving us with absolutely nothing in the bank to do the furnishings. As usual these got delegated to a later day when we have the money. (This seems to be a steady refrain with us; I think “when we have the money then we will do this and that and that.”) Everybody from home planned to come for the house-warming thus making a cot essential. My grand parents were coming; obviously you couldn’t expect them to sleep on the floor. We fought over cots, visited different shops and finally fell in love with the furniture at Maya Organic. Simple yet elegant rubber wood furniture stained to match the décor of your home. We saw two cots that we loved, had the budget only for one. Bought that and went back to that shop 6 months later to buy the other one (by then they had hiked the price by 4k!!!).
[The bed that i fell in love with. Low level-king size]
Both of us being book lovers next in line was a book shelf. There was a small nook upstairs which was perfect. Wanting something different we raided the internet for designs. Both of us picked one and fought over them. In the end, the BH combined two of the designs we both liked into something like this. For me this is the best part of our home. I can spend hours looking at the books and feeling so happy with myself and the world.
Both of us being book lovers next in line was a book shelf. There was a small nook upstairs which was perfect. Wanting something different we raided the internet for designs. Both of us picked one and fought over them. In the end, the BH combined two of the designs we both liked into something like this. For me this is the best part of our home. I can spend hours looking at the books and feeling so happy with myself and the world.
[Six seater dark wood dining table]
Wooden chairs. Searched everywhere for them and finally got it at an exhibition.
Our balcony ( a work in progress). The big whale and the tortoise guarding the small fishes in the urli.
We are no where finished. What is remaining? The drawing room furniture needs to be upgraded. Mowgli’s room has to be furnished. Our study still remains a dream. Currently making do with the old dining table functioning as a stand for the desktop and laptop. The upper floor needs to be converted into a living room which is a major work. Parapet gardens to be made for the balconies. There is a lot more work. With me not working full time, there is a strain on resources as we are right now concentrating on pre-paying the housing loan rather than spending on home improvements.
Sometimes the BH feels a little depressed when he visits friends and sees their designer homes. At times like that this is what I say to him; “After all ‘Home’ wasn’t built in a day!”
But seriously, a home is only as good as the people in it. The realization that so many friends/relatives feel so comfortable dropping in and staying with us says millions about our home. That it indeed is a place of warmth, love and happiness filled with happy memories not just for us but for many others too. And in the end that is all that matters.
Our balcony ( a work in progress). The big whale and the tortoise guarding the small fishes in the urli.
We are no where finished. What is remaining? The drawing room furniture needs to be upgraded. Mowgli’s room has to be furnished. Our study still remains a dream. Currently making do with the old dining table functioning as a stand for the desktop and laptop. The upper floor needs to be converted into a living room which is a major work. Parapet gardens to be made for the balconies. There is a lot more work. With me not working full time, there is a strain on resources as we are right now concentrating on pre-paying the housing loan rather than spending on home improvements.
Sometimes the BH feels a little depressed when he visits friends and sees their designer homes. At times like that this is what I say to him; “After all ‘Home’ wasn’t built in a day!”
But seriously, a home is only as good as the people in it. The realization that so many friends/relatives feel so comfortable dropping in and staying with us says millions about our home. That it indeed is a place of warmth, love and happiness filled with happy memories not just for us but for many others too. And in the end that is all that matters.
Our Home
Our Aashiyana.
Monday, December 8, 2008
Keep us safe
The BH and I had gone for Dostana on Sunday. Mowgli at his bua’s place. The theatre was almost empty and that too on a Sunday afternoon. It was sad and shocking.
Halfway into the movie, I was struck with a sudden thought, ‘What if something happens to us? The theatre blows up or something like that. Thank God, Mowgli is not with us. At least he’s safe at home.”
At night the BH and I were talking when I told him this. He looked at me with a serious expression and said “Me too. I was thinking that he would have been alone his entire life if anything happened to us.”
Is this what the terrorists intended? Other than the physical calamities, the psychological one is more terrifying. That unspoken fear in everybody’s hearts. The unanswered question “What if something happens to us?”
I kept on getting up through out the night looked at Mowgli cozily snuggled against the BH and thought of how life would be if anything happened to either of us.
Thought of writing a will. How to ensure that everything goes smoothly?
Finances.
Grand parents.
Different options and scenarios played in and out of my mind.
Woke up troubled and tensed. In these testing times I finally turned to God. Said a quiet prayer and asked him to bless my family and keep them safe. That’s all that I can do.
Keep my family safe, God.
Halfway into the movie, I was struck with a sudden thought, ‘What if something happens to us? The theatre blows up or something like that. Thank God, Mowgli is not with us. At least he’s safe at home.”
At night the BH and I were talking when I told him this. He looked at me with a serious expression and said “Me too. I was thinking that he would have been alone his entire life if anything happened to us.”
Is this what the terrorists intended? Other than the physical calamities, the psychological one is more terrifying. That unspoken fear in everybody’s hearts. The unanswered question “What if something happens to us?”
I kept on getting up through out the night looked at Mowgli cozily snuggled against the BH and thought of how life would be if anything happened to either of us.
Thought of writing a will. How to ensure that everything goes smoothly?
Finances.
Grand parents.
Different options and scenarios played in and out of my mind.
Woke up troubled and tensed. In these testing times I finally turned to God. Said a quiet prayer and asked him to bless my family and keep them safe. That’s all that I can do.
Keep my family safe, God.
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
Back to lacy lingerie...
Its all over. The last physical tie that bound my son to me is gone now. We are finally done with breast feeding. Prepared to spend sleepless nights, the BH and I geared ourselves for the drama that was to be. Friday night was horrible. He was crying the whole time and refused to sleep. I was up the whole night walking him around and napping for short intervals with Mowgli sleeping on my chest. There were moments when I was almost compelled to feed him just so that we could sleep, but kept on telling myself that he is one year old and its high time he needs to eat other foods also. Saturday night was little better. Just the occasional crying. He would wake up 3-4 times, drink water and I would walk him to sleep. Then we both would lie down listening to music, he on my chest again. On Sunday we did the same. And finally on Monday night he realized that theres no point getting up 3-4 times in the night just to drink water! He slept through the night with getting up once or twice. We just had to change his position and pat him to sleep. No fuss. The same yesterday night too. Which means, yes its really over!
It is so sweet and sad at the same time. I am happy and relieved to stop breast feeding. Hopefully I’ll shed all the extra kilos and get back to my previous avatar. Its also a relief to not get up innumerable times every night. In fact after an entire year I slept for more than 5 hrs at a stretch yesterday . But along with all these there’s a small part of me that’s missing it. Missing that special time where it was just the both of us. Just wondering how soon they grow up. How is he taking it? Children have such short memories. In just four days he has completely forgotten that such a thing existed. He has adjusted to it so fast. Is it a character trait or are all kids like this?
There have been so many changes that happened ion the past 2-3 days. He has started drinking cow’s milk. He used to hate it before. Now he drinks two bottles with absolutely no fuss! He points to the bottle and asks for milk now! Never thought this day would come when Mowgli would actually point to food and say yes!!!
Its as if he has suddenly grown up. Eating better, sleeping better, playing more. (Touchwood!)
Progressed to shorts from nappies. Started toilet training. Brushing teeth twice a day. Oh, why dont babies stay babies :-(
It is so sweet and sad at the same time. I am happy and relieved to stop breast feeding. Hopefully I’ll shed all the extra kilos and get back to my previous avatar. Its also a relief to not get up innumerable times every night. In fact after an entire year I slept for more than 5 hrs at a stretch yesterday . But along with all these there’s a small part of me that’s missing it. Missing that special time where it was just the both of us. Just wondering how soon they grow up. How is he taking it? Children have such short memories. In just four days he has completely forgotten that such a thing existed. He has adjusted to it so fast. Is it a character trait or are all kids like this?
There have been so many changes that happened ion the past 2-3 days. He has started drinking cow’s milk. He used to hate it before. Now he drinks two bottles with absolutely no fuss! He points to the bottle and asks for milk now! Never thought this day would come when Mowgli would actually point to food and say yes!!!
Its as if he has suddenly grown up. Eating better, sleeping better, playing more. (Touchwood!)
Progressed to shorts from nappies. Started toilet training. Brushing teeth twice a day. Oh, why dont babies stay babies :-(
We shaved his head too over the weekend. No tears no fighting. Just sat there quietly playing with his toys while the barber snipped off his beautiful curls. At one point of time he touched his head and looked at us with a surprised expression. Then he kept on touching his head and then rubbing his fingers, maybe wondering where the hair went.
By this time he understood that his hair was going and he grew quite angry. One slap for the barber and two bites for poor mama. Lets hope those beautiful girly curls come back :-)
I totally dig this new look! Its not as bad as how I thought it would be. What do you think?
By this time he understood that his hair was going and he grew quite angry. One slap for the barber and two bites for poor mama. Lets hope those beautiful girly curls come back :-)
I totally dig this new look! Its not as bad as how I thought it would be. What do you think?
Monday, December 1, 2008
THE BEAST IS COMING FOR THE FEAST!!!
Roarrrrr..the BH growls and lunges for Mowgli. Looking at them roll around, tickling each other I cant say who is enjoying this more. Mowgli giggling away to glory. The BH treasuring this time and filing away this moment in his cabinet of memories
So howz life with a one year old? Did I think it would be more peaceful? Nah!
The kid is behaving just like his namesake Mowgli! Like a true jungle boy. Climbing up and down the furniture.. trying to lick the shoe polish… almost swallowed a cockroach(YUCK!!!) harassing the little fishes in our balcony… smiling at the neighbors and behaving so nicely with them that they refuse to believe my scary tales! He is one endless bundle of energy. Active from the time he gets up till he sleeps. The moment he gets up, he scrambles over me , down the bed, crawls to the door wriggling his cute butt turns around and looks at his amused and sleepy parents and waves his hand “tata”. In fact that should be named his slogan of the day! Tata at all times, the moment he sees the lift, the car, the maid, anybody outside. Its always TaTa. He should have been on the Alto ad “Lets go, tata”!
He is getting naughtier by the minute... by the second…Lots of small things were missing- mowgli’s powder puff, Vaseline, sipper cap and the like. I had given up on finding them thinking that they’ll turn up when I least expect it. And guess what today morning I discovered his treasure trove – a small gap between the bed and the wall. He would climb on the bed drop the article down that tiny gap climb down; get the next thing and do the same thing over and over again. From where do kids learn all this? It’s so amazing.
His laziness knows no bounds. Too lazy to crawl around, he pushes his car or any object with wheels with one hand and uses that momentum to get to one place from another. Walking is another story altogether. He walks holding on to objects, but till now has not shown any initiative to start walking on his own. If we try to make him walk holding on to our fingers he is more interested in kicking the ball or anything that is in the way!
His lunar sign is famous for its stubbornness and its becoming evident in some ways. He points to wherever he wants to go and we have to take him there. If we don’t then one short scream and sometimes one slap! In the beginning this was very cute, but innumerable slaps later (some with my wooden spatula, comb, toys) it is pretty painful.
This past two weeks Mowgli has been enjoying himself with his new toys. A Winnie-the-pooh bear train, building blocks, a tent house, a red cycle and a small chair are the main headlights.
Of all these the tent house seems to be his favourite. It’s the perfect place for him to hide away from us, use it as a secret getaway to store the spoons and plates he flicks from the kitchen, play peek-a-boo with us, use it as his own space.
My favourite is the chair. He has not yet figured out how to get down from the chair by himself, so it’s the perfect place to plonk him whenever I need to get something done. He is happy to just sit there nibbling on a biscuit offering some to me whenever he gets bored with it. And the way he sits is totally bindaas.He draws up his legs, puts his hand behind the armrest gunda style and looks totally adorable.
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Yet to download the birthday snaps. Will be back soon with them.
Monday, November 24, 2008
I squeezed and
squirmed and pushed and pulled and voila! My old jeans fit!!!!!
They dont fit like how they used to ,because there is a 5kg sagging tummy obstructing the view, but yes, i can at least button it!
Yippppeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
They dont fit like how they used to ,because there is a 5kg sagging tummy obstructing the view, but yes, i can at least button it!
Yippppeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Friday, November 21, 2008
Tired.
Depressed.
With life.
With myself.
Trying to look back and wonder what went wrong this year.
Sifting through memories that need to be left alone.
Have to go on.. look forward.. let things be… understand that people have their own reasons their decisions their responsibility for their actions. Why should it affect me so much? To be hurt when nobody realizes that behind the “don’t-care” facade I care! I care a lot!
After mowgli was born, I always felt that I couldn’t cry anymore. How much ever sad I was I just couldn’t cry. Today the tears are falling freely. Just that I don’t know for what.
Maybe they are;
For the year that is passing by where the BH and I were just little more than strangers to each others.
For Kitu who will not wear those Reebok shoes I had planned to gift him for his next birthday
For a birthday that I waited for an entire year and disappointed me so much
For anniversaries that slipped by un-noticed and ignored
For the times I wanted the BH to understand how I was feeling and he came up with “You are always depressed. What’s new about it?”
For the old me and the me I have turned into nowFor the lost sparkle in my eyes and smile
For the cynic that I have become
For losing the ability to trust anybody again never knowing whether they really will stand by you when you need them
For friends that slipped away when they found their better halves
For a best friend who is leaving to the US for a long long time leaving me with nobody to talk to
For the chores that always look me at my face whenever I want to relax
For the aches and pains that refuse to go away even after so long
For being so tired and un-enthusiastic about life
For wondering what went wrong?
For trying every day to be happy and failing miserably even before the day is over.
For losing out on so many things.
And mainly
For feeling so unwanted
So unloved
So un-cherished
So neglected
Like the furniture in a room.
Serves its purpose by remaining there, but you can still manage without it.
Depressed.
With life.
With myself.
Trying to look back and wonder what went wrong this year.
Sifting through memories that need to be left alone.
Have to go on.. look forward.. let things be… understand that people have their own reasons their decisions their responsibility for their actions. Why should it affect me so much? To be hurt when nobody realizes that behind the “don’t-care” facade I care! I care a lot!
After mowgli was born, I always felt that I couldn’t cry anymore. How much ever sad I was I just couldn’t cry. Today the tears are falling freely. Just that I don’t know for what.
Maybe they are;
For the year that is passing by where the BH and I were just little more than strangers to each others.
For Kitu who will not wear those Reebok shoes I had planned to gift him for his next birthday
For a birthday that I waited for an entire year and disappointed me so much
For anniversaries that slipped by un-noticed and ignored
For the times I wanted the BH to understand how I was feeling and he came up with “You are always depressed. What’s new about it?”
For the old me and the me I have turned into nowFor the lost sparkle in my eyes and smile
For the cynic that I have become
For losing the ability to trust anybody again never knowing whether they really will stand by you when you need them
For friends that slipped away when they found their better halves
For a best friend who is leaving to the US for a long long time leaving me with nobody to talk to
For the chores that always look me at my face whenever I want to relax
For the aches and pains that refuse to go away even after so long
For being so tired and un-enthusiastic about life
For wondering what went wrong?
For trying every day to be happy and failing miserably even before the day is over.
For losing out on so many things.
And mainly
For feeling so unwanted
So unloved
So un-cherished
So neglected
Like the furniture in a room.
Serves its purpose by remaining there, but you can still manage without it.
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOWGLI!!!
Nov 12, 07
6.30 pm
A snapshot of my life in the past one year. Cute baby to naughty boy .
6.30 pm
A snapshot of my life in the past one year. Cute baby to naughty boy .
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
When only memories remain
I had started this post a cople of weeks back. Could never finish it. Would start and then stop and start again. It hurt a lot to complete this. But I had to do this, for myself. For Kitu. For Mowgli.
Dear Mowgli,
You will be a big boy when you read this.
Big enough to understand your mama and dada.
Big enough to know what we are going through when we tell you not to do certain things and why we tell you so.
Big enough to know that you mean the world to us even if we don’t always behave that way.
Its been almost a month since your uncle died. My brother. You have met him just twice, once when you were a baby and second a couple of months back. You had played with him though he was afraid to hold you. He was enthralled by you.
You were just seven months.
He was just 19.
He was into his third year engineering in BITS Goa. Had gone trekking with his friends to DoodhSagar waterfalls. He always loved the water, was crazy about it. He jumped into the small pool made by the running water not heeding the local’s warning that the currents are dangerous and it is deep under the falls. Maybe he was showing off to his friends’ maybe just enjoying being in the water thrilled at nature- nobody knows what happened. At one point he swam too close to the place where the water was falling from a great height and he couldn’t swim back. Could be the currents, or else he got tired or else leg cramps we don’t know. His friends could not save him. The locals gathered there did not jump into the water saying that it was too deep and dangerous. Nobody helped him. He slowly drowned in front of everybody’s eyes. His friends trekked downhill to get some help, but by the time they got to the police station it was already dark and the police said they could search only the next day.
They later found his body the next day 30m deep.
He was so young.
Just starting his life.
I had spoken to him the week before. Talking about what to do after engg. Coming to Bangalore for his summer project. Generally making fun plans for the future. He will not come again.
For his marriage I would have been standing behind his bride. His eldest sister. Now that will not be. He has gone on to another world leaving all of us heart broken.
Its true life goes on and time heals everything. Yet there are times when that dull ache comes. When I see somebody his age I think of him and feel sad that he has missed out on so many things. That trip I was planning with all my cousins, we never got to it and now it is too late. I wanted to go to Goa once and meet him and his friends. Too late for that also.
Too late for so many things.
Too late to tell him how much he meant to me.
And a lot of questions that remain.
Why did he have to swim in the waterfalls?
Didnt he have some sense to see that it was dangerous?
Why didnt any of his friends tell him not to get in?
What the bloody hell were they all thinking?
And the worst question that still tortures me
Did he struggle a lot? What must have gone through his mind at that time. Why did God have to do this to him? Couldnt HE have helped him?
My poor kitu. Lying all alone in the water for an entire 24 hours!!! I cannot even think of it.
Memories that hit you when you least expect it.
I always wanted an elder brother instead of a younger sister. used to think that if I could not get an elder brother would make do with the younger ones. We would all meet at my grand parents house for the summer vacation. I being the eldest and the laziest would generally prefer to read a book and laze in the hammock. He, his bro, my sis and my youngest cousin would play outside the whole day. Shuttle, TT, house, hotel and what not. He was the one who taught me to play Monopoly and Chess. Tried to teach me TT also, but I was too lazy to run around. Evenings we would go to the club where my grand father would try to teach us all to swim. Only he picked it up. The rest of us would just flap about and play in the water.
When I was in school I wanted a teddy bear very much. Must be from reading too many Enid Blytons. My mom refused saying that I was too old for that sort of thing. For his birthday he got three teddy bears out of which I flicked one. Till I got married I used to sleep snuggling it.
When he was small he would look at the buses passing by and pick out a name from them. The whole day we had to call him by that name. One day it would be 'Suresh' ,another day it would be "Kurisingal" and many more. We used to die laughing at his stupid names.
That wildcraft bag we bought him for his treks. He loved it.
There will be no kids of his growing up along with you.
I wish I had seen him more often, called him more often.
Sometimes I think of something to tell him anf then suddenly remember that he is no longer here.
So many myriad thoughts that pop in and out with no special meaning.
Just thoughts.
Mowgli, I don’t want him to be just a story for you. Know that he meant a lot to all of us and nobody can ever ever replace him.
When you grow up, you will do many things with your friends. Some that you might tell me and some you might not. There will come many times when you will have to decide whether to say NO or go along with the flow. Drugs, alcohol, smoking are just few of them. Whatever you do, remember that your life is precious to us. Don’t squander it away on a dare or a show-off in front of your friends. They are not worth it!
I read this poem somewhere and it sort of gives me hope. That if he is there somewhere this is what he might say to me;
Dear Mowgli,
You will be a big boy when you read this.
Big enough to understand your mama and dada.
Big enough to know what we are going through when we tell you not to do certain things and why we tell you so.
Big enough to know that you mean the world to us even if we don’t always behave that way.
Its been almost a month since your uncle died. My brother. You have met him just twice, once when you were a baby and second a couple of months back. You had played with him though he was afraid to hold you. He was enthralled by you.
You were just seven months.
He was just 19.
He was into his third year engineering in BITS Goa. Had gone trekking with his friends to DoodhSagar waterfalls. He always loved the water, was crazy about it. He jumped into the small pool made by the running water not heeding the local’s warning that the currents are dangerous and it is deep under the falls. Maybe he was showing off to his friends’ maybe just enjoying being in the water thrilled at nature- nobody knows what happened. At one point he swam too close to the place where the water was falling from a great height and he couldn’t swim back. Could be the currents, or else he got tired or else leg cramps we don’t know. His friends could not save him. The locals gathered there did not jump into the water saying that it was too deep and dangerous. Nobody helped him. He slowly drowned in front of everybody’s eyes. His friends trekked downhill to get some help, but by the time they got to the police station it was already dark and the police said they could search only the next day.
They later found his body the next day 30m deep.
He was so young.
Just starting his life.
I had spoken to him the week before. Talking about what to do after engg. Coming to Bangalore for his summer project. Generally making fun plans for the future. He will not come again.
For his marriage I would have been standing behind his bride. His eldest sister. Now that will not be. He has gone on to another world leaving all of us heart broken.
Its true life goes on and time heals everything. Yet there are times when that dull ache comes. When I see somebody his age I think of him and feel sad that he has missed out on so many things. That trip I was planning with all my cousins, we never got to it and now it is too late. I wanted to go to Goa once and meet him and his friends. Too late for that also.
Too late for so many things.
Too late to tell him how much he meant to me.
And a lot of questions that remain.
Why did he have to swim in the waterfalls?
Didnt he have some sense to see that it was dangerous?
Why didnt any of his friends tell him not to get in?
What the bloody hell were they all thinking?
And the worst question that still tortures me
Did he struggle a lot? What must have gone through his mind at that time. Why did God have to do this to him? Couldnt HE have helped him?
My poor kitu. Lying all alone in the water for an entire 24 hours!!! I cannot even think of it.
Memories that hit you when you least expect it.
I always wanted an elder brother instead of a younger sister. used to think that if I could not get an elder brother would make do with the younger ones. We would all meet at my grand parents house for the summer vacation. I being the eldest and the laziest would generally prefer to read a book and laze in the hammock. He, his bro, my sis and my youngest cousin would play outside the whole day. Shuttle, TT, house, hotel and what not. He was the one who taught me to play Monopoly and Chess. Tried to teach me TT also, but I was too lazy to run around. Evenings we would go to the club where my grand father would try to teach us all to swim. Only he picked it up. The rest of us would just flap about and play in the water.
When I was in school I wanted a teddy bear very much. Must be from reading too many Enid Blytons. My mom refused saying that I was too old for that sort of thing. For his birthday he got three teddy bears out of which I flicked one. Till I got married I used to sleep snuggling it.
When he was small he would look at the buses passing by and pick out a name from them. The whole day we had to call him by that name. One day it would be 'Suresh' ,another day it would be "Kurisingal" and many more. We used to die laughing at his stupid names.
That wildcraft bag we bought him for his treks. He loved it.
There will be no kids of his growing up along with you.
I wish I had seen him more often, called him more often.
Sometimes I think of something to tell him anf then suddenly remember that he is no longer here.
So many myriad thoughts that pop in and out with no special meaning.
Just thoughts.
Mowgli, I don’t want him to be just a story for you. Know that he meant a lot to all of us and nobody can ever ever replace him.
When you grow up, you will do many things with your friends. Some that you might tell me and some you might not. There will come many times when you will have to decide whether to say NO or go along with the flow. Drugs, alcohol, smoking are just few of them. Whatever you do, remember that your life is precious to us. Don’t squander it away on a dare or a show-off in front of your friends. They are not worth it!
I read this poem somewhere and it sort of gives me hope. That if he is there somewhere this is what he might say to me;
And if I go,
while you're still here...
Know that I live on,
vibrating to a different measure
--behind a thin veil you cannot see through.
You will not see me,
so you must have faith.
I wait for the time when we can soar together again,
--both aware of each other.
Until then, live your life to its fullest.
And when you need me,
Just whisper my name in your heart,
...I will be there.
"Ascension" by Colleen Corah Hitchcock
Trrring Trrring
I look at the phone. Its my old manager. I hesitate. Should I pick up the phone or let it be?
Well, it might be nothing. I pick up the phone. Hello Oxxxxx, How do you do?
Hi. What are you doing now? [This doesn’t sound good. No pleasantries and no chit chats.]
Ummmmm. I am at home.
How old is your kid now? [This is definitely not going in the right direction.]
Ehhhh. He’ll be a year next week. Why?
Good. So what have you planned next? Have you started looking out?
Errrrrrrrrrrr. Not really. I was thinking, but... [Why are you calling me with this right now. I dont want to work now. Dont give me options. Go Go Go!!!]
I have an opening. Why don’t you just give it a look? It’s a senior role and I think its perfect for you. See, don’t you guys have a housing loan [so what???? Yes, the BH is sweating over it. I am trying to ignore it].
How can somebody of your calibre sit at home? The industry needs you. the financial world needs you. [He he he, i added that last part. was just flattering myself :-) ]
I don’t know Oxxxx. I really need to think about it. You know, we don’t have a full time maid and the logistics, I really don’t know [I don’t know seems to be my anthem through out this call!] how we’ll manage.
Oh, you guys will manage. So many people do. There are so many working mothers here. The company will support you blah blah blah.
Well the long and short of it is I have been offered a job. The interview is next week (I blanked out in the middle and the next thing I remember is him telling me so we’ll meet you next week.). I am not sure how am going to manage. Couldn’t sleep yesterday night. I kept on thinking of options like day care, maids. What will they do if Mowgli refuses to eat? Refuses to sleep? After reading so much about child abuse that fear is also there at the back of my mind. He has not even started talking. How will he tell me if something goes wrong?
Finally I woke up and looked at the calendar. It was only Nov 4. I have two months to get ready if I get the job. Two months to look at other options. If it doesn’t work out I can always resign right.
It had to come to this one day. Just that I was thinking maybe by next June or something. This seems to be too early. But will there ever come a right time for leaving my baby with somebody else for 6 hours daily?
The BH and I will have to work out a lot of things. If he could go early and come home a little early say around 3 or 4 then the time with the maid or day care would be reduced. Both of us would have more peace of mind. Kids should grow up with their parents not with maids or outsiders. This calls for sacrifices on both our part.
Before I start getting hyper let me go for the interview next week. Have filled a paper with all my concerns.
My fingers are crossed. Cross yours also.
Monday, November 3, 2008
monday morning blues
Another weekend over. We had planned to go to Nandi Hills to see the sunrise but that didn’t work out. Got the BH’s reports. Everything normal except cholesterol is on borderline high. No medication thankfully, instead the doctor has asked him to reduce weight, cut down on fatty foods, adopt a vegetarian diet and to see him after 6 months. Our countdown begins!
Just look at the state of our generation. Under 30and yet battling with so many chronic conditions-obesity, cholesterol, blood pressure. If we could just make some changes in our lifestyle- eat healthy, spend some time in the outdoors everyday, smoke a little less, and go easy on the alcohol. Don’t we owe it to our children to be healthy for them? If we go at this rate I shudder to think what will it be by the time we reach our 40’s? We are trying to follow a strict plan of playing shuttle every day, reducing the eating out part. Both of us plan to reduce at least 5 kgs by this year end.
On a happier note have started work on the balcony. Replanted some plants, re-arranged the plants on the balcony. Keeping my fingers crossed that the plants all grow hale and hearty soon.
And the main news for the day and days to come- HAVE STARTED THE WEANING PROCESS!!!! Its high time he started taking more interest in other foods rather than breast feeding whole day. Mentally preparing myself for the tantrums and screams. For this week its just the day. If this goes well then slowly have to start weaning him off at night too. That is going to be the hardest part. Why cant kids sleep on their own???
Just look at the state of our generation. Under 30and yet battling with so many chronic conditions-obesity, cholesterol, blood pressure. If we could just make some changes in our lifestyle- eat healthy, spend some time in the outdoors everyday, smoke a little less, and go easy on the alcohol. Don’t we owe it to our children to be healthy for them? If we go at this rate I shudder to think what will it be by the time we reach our 40’s? We are trying to follow a strict plan of playing shuttle every day, reducing the eating out part. Both of us plan to reduce at least 5 kgs by this year end.
On a happier note have started work on the balcony. Replanted some plants, re-arranged the plants on the balcony. Keeping my fingers crossed that the plants all grow hale and hearty soon.
And the main news for the day and days to come- HAVE STARTED THE WEANING PROCESS!!!! Its high time he started taking more interest in other foods rather than breast feeding whole day. Mentally preparing myself for the tantrums and screams. For this week its just the day. If this goes well then slowly have to start weaning him off at night too. That is going to be the hardest part. Why cant kids sleep on their own???
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Happy Diwali
Mowgli's first Diwali.... 
Diyas softly illuminating our threshold for the fairies to dance over it
[
The Rangoli courtesy Chotu]
The Rangoli courtesy Chotu]
Diyas softly illuminating our threshold for the fairies to dance over itFriday, October 24, 2008
pondicherry
A good weekend getaway from Bangalore. We drove to Chennai, picked up friends (Six of us; the BH’s friends and their 6 month old baby and two of our UG friends) and then drove on to Pondicherry or Puducherry as the locals call it.. We had a blast- both literally and figuratively!!!! Chennai was HOT. After living in Bangalore for so long, its quite a challenge to go to some place hot and humid. That was the only part that Mowgli didn’t enjoy.
The Chennai-Pondicherry road is quite scenic with the beach on one side and empty land on the other. On our way back there was a slight drizzle and the mood was definitely romantic.
We stopped at this picturesque location.
The BH, A and P cycled all the way to Auro beach while we, the intelligent folks, followed in the car. A clear sky, saw the sun set, spent time playing in the water, collecting shells did things which I had done many years ago. If there was time would have built a sand castle also.
Saturday was our last day at Pondicherry. Lazed around the resort in the morning. Then went to Auroville. Couldn’t see the Matri Mandir as they had closed for the day. Did some shopping and finally made our way back to Bangalore.
Travelling with Mowgli was not as tiresome as I had thought. The resort where we stayed allowed us to cook his food, he slept in the car while we drove around, ate a little bit of what all we ate, was interested in the new sights. He is quite a friendly chap, so no clinging to me or the BH. He was perfectly happy to roam about with his uncles. Just a little crankiness at the end of our journey. All in all he was the perfect traveler!
I was thinking there are so many places in India that we have not seen and like fools we hanker to go abroad. There are so many weekend getaways from Bangalore, we should travel out more often rather than spending the weekend shopping and roaming about in the umpteen malls. at the least it would be a welcome break from the city life.
The Chennai-Pondicherry road is quite scenic with the beach on one side and empty land on the other. On our way back there was a slight drizzle and the mood was definitely romantic.
We stopped at this picturesque location.
To our surprise we discovered that the waters, though they look deep, were only ankle level. We waded in quite a distance. Mowgli as usual was besides himself with joy on seeing so much of water. 
We reached the resort by night totally tired and hungry. The men immediately went back to Pondicherry town to get the drinks and food while we womenfolk were left behind to tend to tired and cranky babies. Well, boys will be boys!!!
Mowgli was very excited at seeing R. R is the cutest baby (after Mowgli of course!) 5 months younger than Mowgli he still weighs more than him and is very calm and content to lie in one place. It was a surprise to Mowgli to see this baby lie still and not run away when Mowgli approached him. They didn’t actually play with each other; both of them did their own thing. At times mowgli would go pull R’s hand or cheeks and once tried to pull his eyes and another time grabbed R’s essentials. My job was mainly to keep an eye on Mowgli and keep him at a distance from R. By the end of the trip, if R could talk, then he would have told his parents “Lets escape.. Mowgli is comingggggg!”
This is Mowgli pulling R’s shirt and me as the referee.
As such there is not much to see in Pondicherry. Its more of a place to relax. The French quarters and the promenade are nice. We cycled through the French quarters. I had almost forgotten what it was like to ride a bike;a very nice feeling, with the wind blowing against you and theres that feeling of complete freedom. Even Mowgli enjoyed the ride. Wide eyed with a blue bandanna on his head he was very happy looking around and finally slept off in the sling.
We reached the resort by night totally tired and hungry. The men immediately went back to Pondicherry town to get the drinks and food while we womenfolk were left behind to tend to tired and cranky babies. Well, boys will be boys!!!
Mowgli was very excited at seeing R. R is the cutest baby (after Mowgli of course!) 5 months younger than Mowgli he still weighs more than him and is very calm and content to lie in one place. It was a surprise to Mowgli to see this baby lie still and not run away when Mowgli approached him. They didn’t actually play with each other; both of them did their own thing. At times mowgli would go pull R’s hand or cheeks and once tried to pull his eyes and another time grabbed R’s essentials. My job was mainly to keep an eye on Mowgli and keep him at a distance from R. By the end of the trip, if R could talk, then he would have told his parents “Lets escape.. Mowgli is comingggggg!”
This is Mowgli pulling R’s shirt and me as the referee.
As such there is not much to see in Pondicherry. Its more of a place to relax. The French quarters and the promenade are nice. We cycled through the French quarters. I had almost forgotten what it was like to ride a bike;a very nice feeling, with the wind blowing against you and theres that feeling of complete freedom. Even Mowgli enjoyed the ride. Wide eyed with a blue bandanna on his head he was very happy looking around and finally slept off in the sling.
The BH, A and P cycled all the way to Auro beach while we, the intelligent folks, followed in the car. A clear sky, saw the sun set, spent time playing in the water, collecting shells did things which I had done many years ago. If there was time would have built a sand castle also.
Saturday was our last day at Pondicherry. Lazed around the resort in the morning. Then went to Auroville. Couldn’t see the Matri Mandir as they had closed for the day. Did some shopping and finally made our way back to Bangalore.
Travelling with Mowgli was not as tiresome as I had thought. The resort where we stayed allowed us to cook his food, he slept in the car while we drove around, ate a little bit of what all we ate, was interested in the new sights. He is quite a friendly chap, so no clinging to me or the BH. He was perfectly happy to roam about with his uncles. Just a little crankiness at the end of our journey. All in all he was the perfect traveler!
I was thinking there are so many places in India that we have not seen and like fools we hanker to go abroad. There are so many weekend getaways from Bangalore, we should travel out more often rather than spending the weekend shopping and roaming about in the umpteen malls. at the least it would be a welcome break from the city life.
Friday, October 17, 2008
Today is one of those days….
The BH and Mowgli have not had breakfast. Both of them left it half way. Mowgli has caught a cold and cough and though today he is much much better than the past two days, the “I –will-not-touch-food” strike continues. Well, that is his excuse. The BH rose in protest at the way I was trying to forcefeed Mowgli. He just has to protest and shake his bum and dance to office. I am the person who has to run behind Mowgli the whole day trying to get him to eat and when he does not deal with a hungry and cranky baby.
I just feel like resigning from this “job”. The job pressure is getting too much and none of the deliverables are being met. And to add to it I have an unsupportive team member who is not doing his share.
Can I resign?
Momma????
Oh I forgot! I had signed a lifetime contract when I took up this post.
Righto!!!!
****************************************************************************************
Things are much better now. Mowgli took pity on me an hour later and ate up all his oats all the while pointing at the birdies and the cars. I think he understood that mama has reached her breaking point, so lets pamper mama some. He climbed on top of me pulled my ears towards him and bit me hard on the chin. Not fully satisfied he started slapping my cheeks with those stubby fingers and to round it up one good poke in the eye! Ouch! I could do with less of this pampering, son if you don’t mind. he played with his toys till lunchtime and just as i was beginning to feel proud of him for being such a sweetie pie, he threw his lunch at me @!@$#$%^&%^%$#@!
DID I SAY I WAS RESIGNING????
I just feel like resigning from this “job”. The job pressure is getting too much and none of the deliverables are being met. And to add to it I have an unsupportive team member who is not doing his share.
Can I resign?
Momma????
Oh I forgot! I had signed a lifetime contract when I took up this post.
Righto!!!!
****************************************************************************************
Things are much better now. Mowgli took pity on me an hour later and ate up all his oats all the while pointing at the birdies and the cars. I think he understood that mama has reached her breaking point, so lets pamper mama some. He climbed on top of me pulled my ears towards him and bit me hard on the chin. Not fully satisfied he started slapping my cheeks with those stubby fingers and to round it up one good poke in the eye! Ouch! I could do with less of this pampering, son if you don’t mind. he played with his toys till lunchtime and just as i was beginning to feel proud of him for being such a sweetie pie, he threw his lunch at me @!@$#$%^&%^%$#@!
DID I SAY I WAS RESIGNING????
Monday, October 13, 2008
Hilarious!
.. and so true. I felt like laughing and crying at the same time while reading this-"Parenting Issues". This is soooooooooooooooo true!!!
Enjoy folks.
Enjoy folks.
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
of kids and kids
Women gather together to wear silly hats, eat dainty food, and forget how
unresponsive their husbands are. Men gather to talk sports, eat heavy
food, and forget how demanding their wives are. Only where children gather
is there any real chance of fun. ~
Yesterday we had gone out for dinner with friends. They have a 3 year old boy Yuhan who is absolutely hyperactive and very sweet. The whole 3 hours that we were there mowgli was totally fascinated with Y. He kept on crawling after Y, looking at him laughing; trying to throw the ball the way Y does and all in all became a one man fan club for Y. It was so nice to see both the kids play together. Mowgli dedicatedly following Y… Clambering up on the bean bag, trying to throw the basketball into the hoop and then clapping his hands himself, delicately licking the ice-cream from the spoon, Y running away from Mowgli, then repenting and giving him his toys with strict instructions “Donot put it in your mouth.” The look on Mowgli’s face, he was sooooo happy and thrilled. When we were about to leave Mowgli crawled up to Yuhan and held his leg tight. He then managed to get Yuhan to bend and planted two lovely bites on his cheeks. A bite is the highest form of adoration that you can get from Mowgli. His physical “I Love you” is pulling the other person’s ears to him and biting the cheeks or the nose. Poor Yuhan sure didn’t like that part!
What I saw yesterday between those two boys just validates the argument that kids need kids to grow up. And it made me think hard about a second baby, sooner so that there will not be much of an age gap between the two and they’ll grow up together and be more of friends.
P.S. I can imagine the heart attack the BH is going to have when he reads this! and i am not thinking about the nappy changing and the 2 hourly night feedings!!! maybe fast before i change my mind!
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
WATERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
Mowgli’s latest addiction is water. Not to drink, but to play with and splash around. Bath times are mega masti with him putting all his toys into the bucket and splashing the water all around. The moment the tap is opened, he tries to catch the water in his hands and then looks surprised as to why he is not able to. He gets so excited at just the sight of all that water all around him, starts clapping his hand and giggling away to glory. Its truly a sight to behold! His crazy momma joins in the fun pouring water from one bucket to another, creating mini waterfalls and rivers and springs within those four walls
I catch my breath and say a silent prayer that this unadulterated fun will always remain, that he will always have the ability to find joy in the simplest of things and to enjoy each moment as they come. Here mowgli is the teacher and I am just a novice.
I catch my breath and say a silent prayer that this unadulterated fun will always remain, that he will always have the ability to find joy in the simplest of things and to enjoy each moment as they come. Here mowgli is the teacher and I am just a novice.
Monday, October 6, 2008
BACK!!!!
A looong break…
Nothing happened, just the usual lethargy.. caught up in different things.. net not working when the mood to write came… back pain, so couldn’t sit for long.. and so on and so forth!!!!
What has been happening all this while? A LOT!!!!
Mowgli has been initiated into the adult world of toiletries starting with our very own toothbrush to brush those small pearly whites that have cropped up (at last count four of them!). He seems to enjoy the daily brushing opening his mouth wide and grinning away to glory. Other developments, wellllll… he can stand up now holding onto something for support. This can be translated as everything under 3 ft BEWARE! Dressing tables, corner shelves, knick-knacks everything is at risk from teeny weeny exploring fingers and an adventurous mouth. Nothing is safe anymore. I have to be constantly on the lookout as to what is going into his mouth. While I do the cooking he sits with me on the floor playing with his spoons and plates and making a huge din. Opens the kitchen drawers and stuffs his toys inside them. And once I caught him sitting inside the cupboard while all the utensils were thrown out. (Couldn’t get a picture of that cuteeeeeeeeeee sight!)
Fiercely independent (don’t know whether to feel happy or sad at this).Can charm the clothes off your back with the sweetest smile you ever saw and the worst part, he knows it too! Completely at ease with everybody. Has total strangers eating out of his hands with just a smile. A ball of energy, running around the whole day. Mischievous to the core. Fun loving. That’s my boy.
Nothing happened, just the usual lethargy.. caught up in different things.. net not working when the mood to write came… back pain, so couldn’t sit for long.. and so on and so forth!!!!
What has been happening all this while? A LOT!!!!
Mowgli has been initiated into the adult world of toiletries starting with our very own toothbrush to brush those small pearly whites that have cropped up (at last count four of them!). He seems to enjoy the daily brushing opening his mouth wide and grinning away to glory. Other developments, wellllll… he can stand up now holding onto something for support. This can be translated as everything under 3 ft BEWARE! Dressing tables, corner shelves, knick-knacks everything is at risk from teeny weeny exploring fingers and an adventurous mouth. Nothing is safe anymore. I have to be constantly on the lookout as to what is going into his mouth. While I do the cooking he sits with me on the floor playing with his spoons and plates and making a huge din. Opens the kitchen drawers and stuffs his toys inside them. And once I caught him sitting inside the cupboard while all the utensils were thrown out. (Couldn’t get a picture of that cuteeeeeeeeeee sight!)
Fiercely independent (don’t know whether to feel happy or sad at this).Can charm the clothes off your back with the sweetest smile you ever saw and the worst part, he knows it too! Completely at ease with everybody. Has total strangers eating out of his hands with just a smile. A ball of energy, running around the whole day. Mischievous to the core. Fun loving. That’s my boy.
And I leave you with these taken at his Bua's wedding. Good night folks:
Monday, July 28, 2008
Bringing up Mowgli.
“Mowgli! Mowgli! Mowgli!” The girls scream themselves hoarse. “We want sixer. Mowgli!” Mowgli walks into the stadium, quiet and confident looks at the crowd and points his bat at them. The crowd waits with bated breath. Will he or wont he? The first ball comes, Mowgli slowly strikes it as if warming up. The disappointed crowd boos and the chants increase in fervor. “Mowgli! Mowgli! Mowgli!” The bowler bowls the second ball and Mowgli swipes at it. The ball is up in the air and IT’S A SIX!!! The crowd gets delirious. Mowgli looks at them and says “I play for myself not for the girls”
Oh yeahhhhhhhhhhhhh…
This is what I heard while eavesdropping on a father-son moment. The BH has got Mowgli’s entire career mapped out. He can either become an IPL star so that BH can retire on Mowgli’s earnings or else win any one of those reality singing shows. Please note that nowhere is it mentioned that “you should study well so that you can get a good job”.
Modern dads!!!
Oh yeahhhhhhhhhhhhh…
This is what I heard while eavesdropping on a father-son moment. The BH has got Mowgli’s entire career mapped out. He can either become an IPL star so that BH can retire on Mowgli’s earnings or else win any one of those reality singing shows. Please note that nowhere is it mentioned that “you should study well so that you can get a good job”.
Modern dads!!!
Snippets
a looooooooooong interval... the net was down for a couple of weeks and with this and that and what not there was no time to blog.
here are some snippets from the weeks gone by...
The BH has gone on a week long trip and Mowgli is acting up. He is on a hunger strike where even the sight of food is enough to make him feel full. Two spoons and the drama begins. Throws everything on the table to the ground, refuses to open his mouth, starts crying, the entire works. I have tried giving him only things that he likes, but of no use. Totally fed up I put him on the floor saying “Go! Do whatever you want!”. The little imp started crawling full speed towards the front door. On reaching the door, he stopped and gave me a look as if to say “ This is it mama, I am leaving!”
I now have to take ATTITUDE from an eight month old????
*************************************
The tooth fairy has still not visited us. So we are still gnawing on carrots and beetroots and chappals and dustbins and mama’s weary nerves .
******************************************
Last week was an accident prone week. Mowgli fell off the stairs. Yes, we were planning to put a gate and no we didn’t think he would learn to climb them so fast and yes, we should have listened to all of you and done it when he was 3 mths. It happened in a split second. He was playing with his toys pretty far from the staircase and when I turned my back he was on the second step. It was quite a shock to me, though mowgli stopped crying pretty soon. We are taking no more chances, the gate was fixed that night itself.
The next day I burnt his hand!!! We use an electric steamer to steam his nose whenever he gets a cold. He hates it and is almost always crying and flaying his hands and legs. In the process, his finger went too near the nozzle and it got burnt. Quite a bad one. There was a huge blister and it covered almost the whole of his short stubby finger.
And the many falls in the course of daily life.
My ears are steaming from the advices and the admonishments while my bonny baby is happily crawling about without a fear in the world. Alls well that ends well.
***************************
A new development that is tooo sweet for words. Mowgli has gotten intio this habit of sleeping with his head on my tummy or snuggled into my neck. It is so sweet and tender and nice with his nice baby smell lulling me to sleep. The BH is grrrrrrrrrrreeeeeeeeeeeeeeen with envy :-) hahahhaha
here are some snippets from the weeks gone by...
The BH has gone on a week long trip and Mowgli is acting up. He is on a hunger strike where even the sight of food is enough to make him feel full. Two spoons and the drama begins. Throws everything on the table to the ground, refuses to open his mouth, starts crying, the entire works. I have tried giving him only things that he likes, but of no use. Totally fed up I put him on the floor saying “Go! Do whatever you want!”. The little imp started crawling full speed towards the front door. On reaching the door, he stopped and gave me a look as if to say “ This is it mama, I am leaving!”
I now have to take ATTITUDE from an eight month old????
*************************************
The tooth fairy has still not visited us. So we are still gnawing on carrots and beetroots and chappals and dustbins and mama’s weary nerves .
******************************************
Last week was an accident prone week. Mowgli fell off the stairs. Yes, we were planning to put a gate and no we didn’t think he would learn to climb them so fast and yes, we should have listened to all of you and done it when he was 3 mths. It happened in a split second. He was playing with his toys pretty far from the staircase and when I turned my back he was on the second step. It was quite a shock to me, though mowgli stopped crying pretty soon. We are taking no more chances, the gate was fixed that night itself.
The next day I burnt his hand!!! We use an electric steamer to steam his nose whenever he gets a cold. He hates it and is almost always crying and flaying his hands and legs. In the process, his finger went too near the nozzle and it got burnt. Quite a bad one. There was a huge blister and it covered almost the whole of his short stubby finger.
And the many falls in the course of daily life.
My ears are steaming from the advices and the admonishments while my bonny baby is happily crawling about without a fear in the world. Alls well that ends well.
***************************
A new development that is tooo sweet for words. Mowgli has gotten intio this habit of sleeping with his head on my tummy or snuggled into my neck. It is so sweet and tender and nice with his nice baby smell lulling me to sleep. The BH is grrrrrrrrrrreeeeeeeeeeeeeeen with envy :-) hahahhaha
Unemployment
Jul 1,08
Finally the curtains have come down. Starting today I am officially “unemployed”. My notice period is over. The promises of being allowed to continue as a part-time consultant didn’t work out. Well, it had to happen someday…
It’s just that till today I never realized how much I identified myself with my job or the institutions where I studied.
It sorts of hurts inside when I meet anybody and they ask me “So what do you do?” I used to feel proud when I mentioned that I am working in XXXX as a XXX. Now I sort of give a whole story about how I was working for the past 4+ years and now my company had closed down and so for the time being I am jobless. But in introspect do I really have to reveal so much? Why cant I just say ‘I am a house wife” and leave it at that. Why do I feel I ought to give others an explanation as to why I’m a house wife? Why is it that people look at you in a different way when you mention that you do not work?
In a way I am glad about this break. I am not constantly worrying myself about what he is doing, what is the maid doing. He is too young for playschools/day care and even when he is older I am not comfortable with the idea of leaving him in day care for 8 hours. On the other hand, I miss working. The daily routines, the mad rush, looking forward to Fridays and most importantly getting a fat paycheck at the end of the month! There is a fear that when I finally start looking out again ( should happen in 3-4 months time) will I get a job that suits me? In terms of flexibility in timings, work form home options etc etc. well, no point breaking my head over the future. As the song goes…
Que Sara Sara,
What will be will be.
The futures’ not ours to say
Que Sara Sara
Finally the curtains have come down. Starting today I am officially “unemployed”. My notice period is over. The promises of being allowed to continue as a part-time consultant didn’t work out. Well, it had to happen someday…
It’s just that till today I never realized how much I identified myself with my job or the institutions where I studied.
It sorts of hurts inside when I meet anybody and they ask me “So what do you do?” I used to feel proud when I mentioned that I am working in XXXX as a XXX. Now I sort of give a whole story about how I was working for the past 4+ years and now my company had closed down and so for the time being I am jobless. But in introspect do I really have to reveal so much? Why cant I just say ‘I am a house wife” and leave it at that. Why do I feel I ought to give others an explanation as to why I’m a house wife? Why is it that people look at you in a different way when you mention that you do not work?
In a way I am glad about this break. I am not constantly worrying myself about what he is doing, what is the maid doing. He is too young for playschools/day care and even when he is older I am not comfortable with the idea of leaving him in day care for 8 hours. On the other hand, I miss working. The daily routines, the mad rush, looking forward to Fridays and most importantly getting a fat paycheck at the end of the month! There is a fear that when I finally start looking out again ( should happen in 3-4 months time) will I get a job that suits me? In terms of flexibility in timings, work form home options etc etc. well, no point breaking my head over the future. As the song goes…
Que Sara Sara,
What will be will be.
The futures’ not ours to say
Que Sara Sara
Wednesday, July 2, 2008
life and what we make of it
was cleaning my inbox and came upon this old forward. thought i'll share this with you.
Suppose someone gave you a pen - a sealed, solid-coloured pen. You couldn't see how much ink it had. It might run dry after the first few tentative words or last just long enough to create a masterpiece (or several) that would last forever and make a difference in the scheme of things. You don't know before you begin.Under the rules of the game, you really never know. You have to take a chance! Actually, no rule of the game states you must do anything. Instead of picking up and using the pen, you could leave it on a shelf or in a drawer where it will dry up, unused. But if you do decide to use it, what would you do with it? How would you play the game?Would you plan and plan before you ever wrote a word? Would your plans be so extensive that you never even got to the writing? Or would you take the pen in hand, plunge right in and just do it, struggling to keep up with the twists and turns of the torrents of words that take you where they take you? Would you write cautiously and carefully, as if the pen might run dry the next moment, or would you pretend or believe (or pretend to believe) that the pen will write forever and proceed accordingly?And of what would you write: Of love? Hate? Fun? Misery? Life? Death? Nothing? Everything?Would you write to please just yourself? Or others? Or yourself by writing for others? Would your strokes be tremblingly timid or brilliantly bold? Fancy with a flourish or plain? Would you even write? Once you have the pen, no rule says you have to write. Would you sketch? Scribble? Doodle or draw? Would you stay in or on the lines, or see no lines at all, even if they were there? Or are they? There's a lot to think about here, isn't there? Now, suppose someone gave you a life...
Suppose someone gave you a pen - a sealed, solid-coloured pen. You couldn't see how much ink it had. It might run dry after the first few tentative words or last just long enough to create a masterpiece (or several) that would last forever and make a difference in the scheme of things. You don't know before you begin.Under the rules of the game, you really never know. You have to take a chance! Actually, no rule of the game states you must do anything. Instead of picking up and using the pen, you could leave it on a shelf or in a drawer where it will dry up, unused. But if you do decide to use it, what would you do with it? How would you play the game?Would you plan and plan before you ever wrote a word? Would your plans be so extensive that you never even got to the writing? Or would you take the pen in hand, plunge right in and just do it, struggling to keep up with the twists and turns of the torrents of words that take you where they take you? Would you write cautiously and carefully, as if the pen might run dry the next moment, or would you pretend or believe (or pretend to believe) that the pen will write forever and proceed accordingly?And of what would you write: Of love? Hate? Fun? Misery? Life? Death? Nothing? Everything?Would you write to please just yourself? Or others? Or yourself by writing for others? Would your strokes be tremblingly timid or brilliantly bold? Fancy with a flourish or plain? Would you even write? Once you have the pen, no rule says you have to write. Would you sketch? Scribble? Doodle or draw? Would you stay in or on the lines, or see no lines at all, even if they were there? Or are they? There's a lot to think about here, isn't there? Now, suppose someone gave you a life...
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
Beware dada.. Here I come!!!
The BH can no longer walk about bare chested in the house. Because a small Mowgli has decided that there should be some variety to his staple food. Why always bother mama for milk???
The rest is left to your imagination.
p.s. your imagination is going in the right direction ( heheheheh)
The rest is left to your imagination.
p.s. your imagination is going in the right direction ( heheheheh)
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Happiness is
- curled up in a corner with a good book and all the time in the world
- Mowgli’s toothless infectious grin
- when the BH is able to catch an early return flight from his tours
- seeing my mama and grampa
- spending time with friends talking and laughing
- doing things with the BH- swimming classes, long drives, morning walks, evening walks, late night corner house breaks-everything
- working your butt off for a deadline and feeling that you have done good work
- watching the rains with a strong cup of coffee
- having a loooooong soak in the tub
- Mowgli sleeping for an extra 15 min so that I get to relax after completing the chores
- when a previously tight dress fits
- a clean house
and today my happiness is my family; the BH and Mowgli
Thursday, June 12, 2008
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