Four years before, it was this day when we finally decided to forget everybody else's opinions and problems and just get married. When we vowed to take care of each other through thick and thin, through trials and sorrows, through life at each step.
When I was young, I had this very rosy idea of marriage. Of finding that one person with whom you share an entire lifetime. Of long walks and rainy evenings and coffee. Of talking and talking only to realize that its dawn. Of I don’t know what. A consequence of too much romance in my brain!
Then I went and married a guy’s guy. Meaning he is most comfortable with his friends. The strong silent types. The one who is a solid rock. For whom romance is an alien concept. Who prefers tea over coffee. (The ultimate sacrilege! Whoever heard of lovers romancing over tea???)
One thing I have realized in these four years is that marriage is not something as simple as just tying a thali and going about your life. There is a lot of work involved. So much is invested in this relationship. Both the partners are more vulnerable as there are no secrets. Every emotion is magnified here, be it the smallest of the smallest hurts or the simple joys. Marriage is something that gives you a lot of happiness and at the same time can give you a lot of pain as well. It requires you to be unconditional in your love which is the most difficult part. To love unconditionally; without expecting anything in return.
Today when I look back, most of my life’s happiest moments have been with the BH.
Of trips that we took and places we saw together. Of having ice cream late at night for no reason, but just because I felt so! Of being complete and content with life. Of being totally sure that whatever happens , this will be there. This relationship. To always fall back on.
He always made sure that I would never complain about lack of space in our relationship. For the 10 odd years that we have been together I have never ever felt stifled. Or that I was not “allowed” to do something. It is still strange when I hear friends talking about how they cannot wear certain outfits or go to certain places etc coz their husbands will not agree. Till date before doing something the thought that I need to ask permission has never crossed my mind. And this for me is the most important thing in any relationship. The freedom to be.
When I knew I was pregnant my first reaction was to howl and say that this is not the best time. I want to go to the Himalayas and how can I go with a baby! The BH consoled me saying that life doesn’t end with having a kid. It only gets richer and who said that you can’t do stuff after having children? He has kept his word. We still go on trips with Mowgli, eat out, have friends over and proceed to live our life as before. Yes, we have not yet gone to the Himalayas, but I’m sure we’ll get there :-) Maybe with Mowgli in tow! Who knows!!!
He is my most staunch supporter, my best advocate, my punching bag. The one person I turn to when I’m sad, the first person I push away when I’m down in the dumps, the one and only person who sees me as I am. In all my moods- good and bad; happy and sad. And still loves me for who I am. And that’s a lot! A HELLUVA LOT!
And today I have nothing more to say to you. Your actions say it all. That you will always be there for me; with me; and by my side.
And for that I thank Thee.
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