Thursday, January 28, 2010

GIVE ME ANOTHER CHANCE

GVE ME SOME SUNSHINE

GIVE ME SOME RAIN

GIVE ME ANOTHER CHANCE

I WANT TO GROW UP ONCE AGAIN!

So given a chance what will you do?

I for one will sit once more for the MBBS entrance examination and make sure I clear it. The feeling that I should have taken it once more instead of taking the easy way out (Engg) is getting reinforced again and again. I really really wish I could have been a doctor. I think I would have made a good doctor :-)

I would have continued with my dance classes. Not just left it because when I moved to a new town, I did not like my new teacher! After learning for 10 years, I should have taken it up professionally. Or at least pursued it regularly. For someone who can be so passionate about dancing, I really do not understand why I did what I did!

I would have ignored the small stuff! Not mentally tortured myself over every one of life's thorns.

Not many regrets when I look back, but the ones that are there are damn strong.

What about you? If given a second chance what would you do?

Aal izz well!

A month has passed and the year has started to feel old. I’m trying to hold on to my resolutions.

Trying to rein in my impatience and to resist snapping at the BH and Mowgli. Have lately realized something strange. That the person I snap the least at is Cocoa in spite of how tiring it gets at times cleaning up the house after her. Daily vacuuming, washing her bathroom, the balconies, taking her out twice a day, mixing stuff in her food so that she finishes it (Yes! I’ve been blessed with two fussy eaters- Cocoa and Mowgli!), brushing her, bathing her. It’s a lot of back breaking work and if you add it to the other work that I already have then it sort of pushes me over the brim. But somehow, I’m gentler with cocoa- more than Mowgli I feel. Is it because she is mute and I feel that since she can’t speak, I must not hurt her or is it because of her undying devotion and love towards me irrespective of how I behave towards her. The happy lick at the end of the day, big paws resting on my chest, she never holds grudges, is always ready to greet me with a huge smile and a wagging tail- so unlike us!!!

The FRM results came. Didn’t clear it. It’s the first exam that I’ve flunked and it hurts the more for it. The BH is pushing me to write it again: his logic is that if I don’t clear it then it’s forever going to stay in my mind like a thorn. So I’ll give it again, but not this year. We frankly do not have that kind of money to waste this year and I’ll have to prepare more for this. It’s not going to work with managing a home, kid and office together. Maybe later on. I don’t know.

The bolero came and brought along with it a fresh wind of travel. We’ve been going on a lot of short drives this month and it becomes us J I like the space, the rugged feeling, the sense of adventure it brings with it! Mowgli loves it, he has captured the middle seats as his paradise. “Boleeeroill tata ponam” (want to go Tata in the Bolero) has become a steady phrase these days.

The paternal grandparents were here for a week and we are royally ignored. Where before I loved this break, this time it hurt! Pretty badly. It hurt that we didn’t get to hug Mowgli at all, he was not interested in talking to us, it just cemented that kids are indeed SELFISH! For him, it was like he got two people who were willing to play with him 24 hrs a day, switch on the Teebee (TV) whenever he wanted, did not force him to eat anything that he did not want and who catered to every whim and fancy. And having got them he just did not want to let them go! We could have used this as a great opportunity and ran off to do our own thing, but instead we sulked and slouched around.

On a happier note, I’ve started driving to work. After sitting on a license for close to 10 years, I’ve finally picked up my courage , ego and the car keys in that order! it’s been eventful to put it mildly. If you find a Maruti 800 going so slowly that pedestrians easily walk by , driven by a crazy lady who glares at the traffic and is seen mumbling to herself well, that’s me!

Another silver lining is Mowgli’s started speaking. Sentences. English, Malayalam, Hindi and Mowgli-speak. “Go to poori!” That is English at Mowgli level. He has picked up a lot of phrases and words from his daycare, from us, from God alone know where! So it’s a mix of English and Malayalam and Hindi with the words substituted wherever. So if he wants to go upstairs he says “Go to Mol” (mol is the shortened version of up in Malayalam). “ Come phasht”. In his world there is always a sense of urgency. There is no “come” it always has to be “come phasht” the faster the better. There are days he wakes up at three in the morning and says “Mowglinu book bayikaam” (Mowgli will read book now). Does he have exams at the daycare???? “Mowglinu Teebee kaanam” ( Mowgli will see the TV now) Note how there is no permission or question in his sentences. They are all orders delivered albeit with a smile! “Koko sit. Mowglinu moli keranam” (Cocoa, Sit. Mowgli wants to get on top of you) and the poor dog that she is obediently sits quietly while his highness clambers on top of her and pretends that he is riding a horse. I’m sure that if Cocoa could speak, one day she would ask God “Of all the houses in Bangalore, why this house? Why me? “ And the best of the lot! His favourite song is “maata kali” (masakali from Delhi 6) The moment the background music starts our man gets all excited saying maata kali maata kali!

All in all Life is happening J and the mantra this year is to LIVE!

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Truth!

"To be in your children’s memories tomorrow, you have to be in their lives today"
‘Effective Parenting’ Ms.Kiranmai Choudary from Glen Doman’s Institutes.