Happy 6 months sweetie!

two pearly whites... first word da-da... celebrated your first fall from the bed yesterday... started solids... refuses to lie down alone... thrown my specs... attempts to crawl... pulls your brothers hair... tried to count cocoa's teeth... smiles at every thing that moves... was the star attraction at Mysore zoo with girls queuing up for your snap... endures all our rough handling... your brother's pet...

to our brave daughter Cheers! You have made our lives beautiful :-)

School woes

Mowgli was initially very happy with school. But now the past two months, it has changed. He does not want to go to school “everybody is bad”. His personality itself has changed. Angry as can be for everything. Even if its for a small thing, say No and the tantrums start ending in huge tears. Shouting at us saying we are not his friends, going to another room and sulking, back answering us for almost everything and then feeling sad. We feel so helpless seeing him struggle like this. I spoke to his teacher and she says the same thing. That they have noticed the change in him, but as to what caused the change, they have no clue.
From what I understand, he has been labeled naughty and bad at school. And it hurts him. Other children push him and when he does the same thing back, they complain about him. Yes, kids will be kids, but teachers should have some sense, right? Either they sit down and talk to him and the other children about what is acceptable behavior or they take the easier route which is to call him a Bad boy and leave it at that. He is naughty, extremely naughty and hyperactive. I know that. But he is not bad. He is very loving beneath the naughtiness. His daycare teachers understood him better. He was one of the naughtiest there also, but there he was loved by all of them. He was made to stand in a corner if he hurt other children, but generally they dealt with him better.
Nowadays education is one of the biggest businesses around. Teachers are recruited without any thought given to their experience or their skills. This is an impressionable age for him and I’m sad that he has it so tough. Yes, it could be that I’m over reacting but however toned down I try to be it doesn’t change the fact that Mowgli has changed in a lot in the past two months. Unlike other parents, we have not hounded the school with complaints of XYZ fighting with Mowgli etc. The teachers themselves admit that, but somehow they do not have the patience to deal with him. The constant refrain is “ he is extremely hyperactive” and as an afterthought “also very intelligent”!
The holidays have started and he is much better these days. Maybe it also helps that we both have been actively trying not to show our irritation with him, praising him when he does something good, trying to be more patient with him rather than shouting at him. Have been reading the book “How to talk so kids listen and listen so kids will talk” and its been worthwhile. I still am not able to do even 10% of what the book suggests, but with what little I’ve changed Mowgli has also changed.
And the kids these days. I get naughty, but I don’t get Mean! And that’s what most kids have turned to these days. Mean with a capital M. “Who wants this chocolate?” and tantalizingly opens it in front of all the kids. Mowgli rushes to them shouting “Me, Me”. They seem to be waiting for this. “No, nothing for you, Mowgli” and then gobble it up in front of him. I’m not talking about kids his age, these are at least 6yrs+. The language, the politics, the mentality .. everything has changed so much. Kids do not talk like kids or even think like kids these days. “Stupid” “Shut your mouth” these are words that I hear 4 yr old kids saying to each other. Sometimes the urge to shake them is so strong!
It makes us more and more aware of our responsibility towards him, of what we will teach him, of principles and values, of behavior and manners. In this materialistic world that’s a tall order!

Confessions of two guilty foodaholics!

The BH at the doorstep on his way to office : "You know something. Yesterday by the time I reached office, I was hungry again and had a chikku shake" ( 30 min from home to office)
Me : " Thats okay. The other day I felt so hungry that I bought two packets of Pure Magic and ate them all." ( the intention was to share them, but the speed at which they were gobbled up defied all saintly intentions)
BH with a wide grin : " Oh, thats okay. I do that all the time. Order Gulabjamoon at office for lunch!"

At what should I feel offended? At the fact that I take the trouble to prepare a healthy lunch plus snacks for him and he goes and has jamoon on top of that? Or is it that he had jamoons and didnt even bring me one?
Definitely the latter! How dare he?

I hate school!

Not Mowgli. Me. He loves it!
What did I expect from school? Facilities similar to his daycare minimum. He leaves home at 8.45 am and returns by 2.45 which in itself is too tiring for a small kid. He has a bus commute of close to two hours both ways. The school doesnot have a snack break, instead they ahve just one break for lunch at 12 pm which I feel is too late for kids who have had a small breakfast at 8.30 in the morning. By the time he comes back, he is tired, cranky and hungry and is just waiting to explode. The tantrums can sometimes start from the bus stop itself or once he reaches home. Most days the lunch is brought back untouched; good days are those where the lunch is half finished. I cannot give him rice/chapathi because both come back untouched. He doesnot eat fruits/raw vegetables. I dont want to give him chips/biscuits and stuff like that. So that limits the options for the lunch box. I try to make him have a proper lunch when he gets back and that is a battle in itself. I'm tired over this battle over food. Breakfast, because I know that is the only thing that will keep him going till evening and most days it is a shouting match and threats to take away his toys and what not. Peaceful breakfasts where he eats whole heartedly are very less. The late lunch that he has is even more stressful. He wants to watch Tom and Jerry, he wants to play. I know he is hungry and tired. The more I insist that he finish his lunch the more he dawdles with it. Extremely tired, I ask him to take a nap, at least lie down quietly on the bed with a book, he refuses. Every refusal is accompanied by tears and howls and throwing things. It ends with me shouting at him or spanking him. In the midst of all this is Bambi who most always has been rudely awakened from her afternoon nap by all this noice would be crying non stop.
Today I left him at the table and went to change Bambi's nappy. Came back to see him nodding off at the table. I picked him up and put him on the bed and he was fast asleep in seconds. Its all I can do to not cry in front of the maid, but I'm this close to losing it! Either the school should take responsibility about lunch, ensure that all kids eat their lunch or else send the kids home by 1 pm. With this timing, he has no proper lunch and no nap in the afternoon and remains a grumpy boy throughout! He has always been hyperactive and underweight, now he is even more skinnier and falls sick at the drop of a hat.
We have talked about this to his teacher, but she tells me that he is very stubborn and doesnot eat his lunch! (Then how did he eat in his daycare??? There all the kids were made to sit down in the dining area for lunch , they couldnot run about. They had to finish what was in the plate.) Here either the teachers do not know how to control kids or else they are just not paying enough attention to the kids.

Rolled over! Rolled over!!!

In a fitting tribute to her brother, Bambi rolled over completely today ! And once she got the knack of it, there was no stopping her. Cocoa was the one most amused at this. The strange being that till now was lying flat now was slowly inching to her territory.

We are going to Kerala tomorrow for two weeks. Two long weeks of food and monsoons and surviving a 10hr car journey with two kids and a dog! Both the kids are down with fever and cold, thereby ensuring that I'll be subjected to advice and criticism from the moment we step out of the car. Am praying that both of them recover at least by the time we reach the Kerala border.

This is Bambi's first trip to kerala and most probably Mowgli will be sidelined with all the attention that she is going to get. Tantrums for sure by Mowgli boy. Pretty adventurous and hectic trip ahead. So Goodbye :-)

Its one of those days!

Those days when i lose my cool at

• Mowgli ruminating with one piece of chapathi in his mouth for one hour. Safely tucked in between his cheek, he gives me a blank look when I get mad at him


• Yet another untouched lunchbox. Excuses are plenty. He had potato chips ( God alone knows from where!), there was no time for lunch, it was too much food in the box ( how can two chapathis be too much food for a energetic boy who had his breakfast at 8.30?) I wonder what the teachers and ayahs are doing. He has been going to daycare for almost two years and I've never had a complaint about him not eating.


• Bambi crying for apparently no reason. She doesnot want to feed, she does not want to sleep, she does not want to lie down and play. She just wants to cry cry and cry!


• At a tummy that still looks 5 months pregnant. I had slogged and slogged to lose all the kilos that I had piled on after Mowgli and now back to square one. It just hurts like hell and now with two kids, I know i will not be able to devote so much time to working out.


• At parents for reasons silly and real.


• Mowgli wetting his bed every night. He had got over it and was sleeping through the night. Now he is again back to wetting it twice or thrice at night


• At cracked heels and corns and calluses. At my laziness to do something about them.


• At all the aches real and imagined


• And at me for sometimes being my mother and sometimes being my father and sometimes being just me!!!

Three months!

Dear Bambi,

Three months before, this time, I was sleeping in front of the operation theatre. The doctor was late and we had had no sleep the previous night. What with being taken for various tests at 3am and what not. The catheter was irritating (to put it very mildly) and I just wanted to get everything over. I was scared and anxious unlike the first time. Maybe because I knew better now. The BH and my mother were waiting outside each in their own world of thoughts. Both reliving Mowgli's birth.

After what seemed like eternity they wheeled me into the operation theatre, and then it was a flurry of activities. Pressure taken, random people describing my case history, questions asked of me on why I had opted for a C section, curled into a ball readying myself for the spinal anaesthesia. My doctor came in rushing and we were ready to cut! Everything happened very fast, I was fully conscious talking to the junior doctor when you were pulled out "Its a Boy! Its a Boy." I was slightly disappointed, but happy thinking of the cute nickname that we had selected for the boy. "Oops, Its a Girl Its a Girl, that was the umbilical cord!" Everybody in the theatre started laughing and that is how you came into our lives. To the sound of laughter…

The first sight I had of you was wide open legs. I finally had to tell the doctor, "Yes, I got it. Its a girl. Now can you please show me her face!" I kissed you and there were tears in my eyes. Now, I dont know how that came about. With your brother, there were no tears, I was just relieved that after 6 long and horrible hours, he had finally decided to make an appearance! Seeing you for the first time was a sweet feeling. That the girl we had so longed for had finally come.

They cleaned you up, wrapped you in a blue flannel and went to show the BH and mamama. and Your dada kept on asking the doctor, "Boy or Girl?". The wily fellow just said "Why dont you see for yourselves?" and slowly took his sweet time unwrapping you. Your mamama says that your dada was ready to grab you from the doctor by this time. And once he knew, it was a girl, the baby girl that he dreamt about he was quiet, so happy that there were no words. He has always maintained that Mowgli and I gang up on him and he needed a girl to be on his side always. Well, now that you are here lets all gang up on your dada :-)

Three months went by really fast as always. You are one of the happiest babies I've ever seen (*Touchwood*). Content to lie down quietly, and once you started smiling, always smiling. You talk to yourself in different tones and if we dont pay attention, the tone starts becoming shriller and shriller. Mowgli loves you and kisses you the first thing in the morning. You are very patient allowing him to smother you with his kisses, not reacting much when he slyly pinches you. Most evenings, you lie down on your playmat surrounded by cars and a hyper brother and a hyper dog! You have started travelling at 2 months, and completely at ease. You have been to drop your chachan at school, pick him up from the bus stop, have bought vegetables, walked in the play area downstairs, been to the swimming pool and even gone to the airport in a volvo!!! Others see you and exclaim "Such a small baby, why have you brought her out of the house?"But you are one tough chick! You fix them with a stare and then with a sweet smile. Tagging behind your brother from now itself. I shudder to think of the days when you will start crawling behind him.We are more relaxed with you, after all we are veterans by now :-) Enjoying playing with you, talking to you. By the way, thats what you like the best- people talking to you. You also talk back making sounds in different tones. Its fun! Your nickname is still in dispute. Your dada is still sticking to his "old fashioned name" and I to the "modern cute name". I have the family behind me and your dada has the friends. Mowgli, depending on which of us he needs more, changes the nickname to gain preference. At times he will tell us to call you "Gudiya baby", "rehaan baby" etc. As the lady of this house, I have hope and faith that mine will be the last word, and my name will stick. Well, time will tell!
So, as always keep smiling and God Bless.
P.S. Do try to lift your lazy butt and roll over. Your hyperactive brother rolled over at this time!

Love,
Mama